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Should We Allow Our Bisexual Daughter Have Sleepovers?

Welcome to “Survivor, ” for which writer Catherine Newman attempts to answr flip through this site fully your questions regarding adolescents and just why they’re like this — and just how to love them despite every thing.

Have relevant concern for Newman? Deliver it to her right here.

Our daughter that is 16-year-old came as bi. We’re totally supportive of this, but they are not sure the way to handle sleepovers. Do we continue steadily to enable them with girls yet not guys because that appears appropriate though it makes no sense that is logical? Expand the guidelines to add males, because what difference does it make? Ban them entirely and win the Meanest Parents award? Assist!

— Experiencing Sleepovers

“Totally supportive” is such an attractive place to start, Struggling. In the event that you cherish your child and respect her sex and she trusts both you and your motives, you then’ve all started using it produced in the color, whatever pajama-party guidelines you wind up selecting.

And I also don’t understand that rules will be the real strategy to use right right right here. Clearly, you don’t like to lock your daughter up in a tower like some chaste, bi Rapunzel awaiting her prince or princess to rise up her long braid or grab onto her buzz cut and save her. And truly, you don’t desire to discipline her for developing as bisexual by constraining her social life as a outcome. Therefore are you able to speak to her entirely transparently about sleepovers and exactly what your concerns are? Or even reframe the relevant concern: Did you know exactly what your issues are?

As an example, have you been concerned that your particular child won’t find a way to share with the essential difference between friendship emotions and feelings that are sexual?